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Three race horses stood in their stalls. One said to other others: "I ran 20 races and
I won 15 of them!" he bragged. The next said with a snort, "Well, I ran 30 races and
won 25 of them!" Then the third horse spoke up proudly, "Yeah, I ran 41 races and
won 39 of them!" This seemed to settle the topic when thhe horses noticed a
Greyhound outside their stalls. The Greyhound said, "I ran 100 races and I won 99
of them." The horses looked at each other in amazement and one gasped, "Wow!
A talking greyhound!"
A cowboy goes into a bar, has a beer, walks outside and finds his horse has been
stolen. He walks back into the bar, fires his gun through the ceiling. "Which one of
you mothers stole my hoss?" he yells. No one answers. "All right, I'm gonna have
one more beer and if my hoss ain't outside by the time I finish, I'm gonna do what I
dun in Texas." He drinks another beer, walks outside, and his horse is back. So he
gets on it and gets ready to ride out of town. The bartender walks out of the bar and
asks, "Say pardner, what happened in Texas?" The cowboy turns to him, and says,
"I had to bloody walk home."
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It was a sunny afternoon when Bob said to George, "Hey, George, why don't we
get ourselves 2 horses? We could ride them in the summer and in the winter we
could put them in the paddock behind the house." George thought it was a great idea,
so the next day they went out and bought themselves 2 horses. They rode them in
the summer, but when winter came George got worried. He said "Hey, Bob, how
are we going to tell them apart next spring?" Bob said, "Well, I'll shave the mane off
mine and you shave the tail off yours." This satisfied George, so he did. The next
spring when they went back to get their horses they found the horses' hair had all
grown back. Alarmed, George said, "Oh great, now how are we going to tell them
apart?" and Bob said, "Well, you can have the black one and I'll take the white one."
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